Are All Men A Little Gay? Yeah Maybe.
January 17, 2007
I would like to start off by saying the opinions expressed in this post are not the opinions of all men. Probably not the opinions of all women either. It is however, the bold opinion of the man writing this post, me. Now why in hell would I be thinking such…I’ll say nonsense for arguement sake, in the first place. The answer…I really don’t have one. Not one that would make reasonable sense. It may be a cummulation of observations that I have stored away for such a moment as this one. Or it could be solely because of the middle aged gentleman I caught taking a peak at the hardware before I hit the shower after a long workout. Whatever the reason, who’s to say I am completely off base here. Is what I am going to say controversial? Maybe. Uninformed? Maybe. Truthful? Maybe. It could be all three and more for all I know. But what I do know is that it is an interesting idea.
Take for instance, the simple act of peeing in a public urinal. Gentlemen, you know the usual scene. Man walks in and pisses in the short urinal instead of the big boy one that is right next to you. Why? For what reason? To more efficiently fight the urge to look at your junk out of the corner of his eye to see what your holding? Chances are he will do it anyway because men are wired in a way that makes us very competitive. And the size of your “member” seems to be a big determinant of your manhood. Personally, I find it pretty easy to look down and away or straight ahead at the wall, but I to have fell to the temptation to sneak a peak just like the rest of you. Does it make you gay? Well…no. A little gay? Yeah maybe.
Not yet convinced that all of us may have a little gay in us? (Pun not intended) Think on this thought. You are going to have to swallow (again, not intended) your pride and ego on this one. Somewhere during your life time you have wondered what it would be like to kiss another guy. You don’t have to admit it out loud if you don’t want to. But dammit if it ain’t true. Now the thought alone does not make you gay or bi-sexual unless you act on it, or in a movie where your getting boo-coo dollars to do it (Brokeback Mountain). But does it make you a little gay? Yeah maybe.
Still unconvinced? How about the infamous prank known to all men as Tea-bagging. What is not gay about dropping your nuts on another man’s chin? Should I mention Brown-nosing? Not only is that gay, its raunchy gay. Now we’ve all done them. And are they a little gay? Yeah maybe. [Sidebar: Guys also think that fucking a guy in the ass is not gay because you are not receiving it, or receiving a blow job from another guy is not gay because you are not performing that act. Just to clear all that up. No matter how you try to reason them out, both are very gay. You are gay. Deal with it.]
If you are still not convinced, you are probably a narrow-minded homophobic douchbag. But here I go. One more reason why you are probably a little gay. Porno. We all watch it, we all love it. Nothing is better to watch than some chick getting face fucked, ass raped, gangbanged, or pussy plowed over and over again. Unless of course it’s you doing all those things. [Disclaimer: Actually face fucking, ass raping, gangbanging and pussy plowing another human being without proper consent is wrong and I do not personally condon those actions] Now here’s the gay factor. Do you want to watch some dude with a pencil thin dick doing all those things you dream you could do just once? No fucking way! You want the guy strapped with a Colt .45 handling that business. Is that a little gay? Yeah maybe.
So there you have it. A few reasons why, if you think about it, you may just be a little gay.
The author of this post is not gay. He has never had a gay encounter. He is fiance’d to a beautiful woman whom he loves dearly. But does this post make him a little gay? Yeah maybe.
New…The Dumb Files
January 17, 2007
So another week has gone by, so another week of The Dumb Files is upon us all. Last week if you re-call I talked about a man getting pulled over for drunk driving. This week I decided to look at the other side of the law with a couple dumb laws that are still in existence. I am only going to put up three, just because there are some many from each state that three is all you get.
Alabama has the first dumb law: Peanuts are not allowed to be sold in Lee County, Alabama after sunset on Wednesdays. Why only on Wednesday?
New York has this dumb law: In Greene, New York, During a concert, it is illegal to eat peanuts and walk backwards on the sidewalks. Again with the peanuts!?
Pennsylvania has this final dumb law: In the Mount Pocono region any group of 5 or more Native Americans are to be considered a raiding party and may be killed on the spot. Yeah, I live in a “we still don’t fuck around” kind of state.
All equally as dumb as the next. Funny that they are still considered laws but probably don’t ever get enforced.
You know where the comments at. ENJOY.
The Golden Globes, Me?
January 17, 2007
Yes, your eyes do not deceive you. I actually watched the Golden Globes Monday night for the first time, well until I fell asleep on the couch. I did miss, I think, one of the best awards given, the award for Best male/female comedy. It’s the biggie size value meal of the entire night and I fell short of seeing the funniest person on tv, thats just my luck. The sad thing is that the Golden Globes will be part of my yearly life from here on out. You see, my fiance lives for this shit, along with the Oscars, Grammys and SAG Awards. For all I know, it’s all the same shit.
And whats worse than actually watching the award show? I am not even sure I should be revealing this tid bit of information (sweat bead of embarrassment), but I will. I also sat through the Golden Globes “pre-game” show (Gulp!) I say “pre-game” because it sounds a bit less gay, when in actuality my testicals went to bed 4 hours before the rest of me did. The one time I don’t listen to my other head and look what happens, I get demanized (de-man-ized…a new word). The only thing that saved my night and part of my manhood…Hollywood ass! All of my favorite lovelies were out that night on the red carpet: Eva, Hayden, Evangeline, Ali, Jessica and so many more. Plus some I haven’t seen before that have now found themselves on my radar. My new favorite - Danielle Harris. 
So all was not lost. It also got me thinking of a few Top 10 lists. Coming Soon!
Anal Gangbang World Record - 101
January 16, 2007
As many of you know, the world record for anal gangbang is 101 dicks in the ass. Talk about working hard for the money. Anyway, the women who holds this record is none other than Victoria Givens. The anal goddess, as she likes to be called or the bottomless one, as I will be calling her now that she has the record, has been in and starred in over 100 adult videos. And when I say now, I mean still, because she broke that record (50) back in 2004. You can check out that DVD at Victoria Givens World Record Anal Gangbang.
It has been three years since she took 101 consecutive dicks in the ass. So why do I bring this up now? Because I recently got her autograph. Addressed personally to me. I will give all of the porn fanatics a second to be jealous…go ahead and be jealous. Having her autograph isn’t a real big deal, but I do think it is blog worthy. Scroll down to see my personalized autograph picture. The star of Ass Masters herself, Ms. Victoria Givens. Comment and Enjoy!
My Many Faces, Part 1
January 15, 2007
For many of you who don’t know me, I am going to let you in on a little secret. I like to rock a closely manicured beard. Personally, I think it looks tight and I pull it off pretty damn good. My fiance however, does not like it at the length I normally like to keep it. Soooooo, I usually trim it down to the 5 o’clock shadow look where she likes it. If it works better for her, it makes my life a bit easier. Otherwise, she locks it up until I trim it down. DAMN YOU WOMEN! and your power over us.
So I decided to let the public decide on various facial hair looks for myself. Over the next several weeks, I will be posting 5 looks. Ranging from full beard to fully shaven. I ask that you vote (comments section) on each look giving a score of 1 to 5, 5 being the best. The winning style will be rocked for atleast a day and I will post any reaction that I receive.
Look number one will be……the full beard (I apologize for how big the picture is)
ENJOY.
Has Ashlee Finally Cast Her Own Shadow?
January 11, 2007
I cam across a couple of current pictures of Ashlee Simpson the other day, and I hate to say it, but she looked pretty damn good. Is it conceivable that she is now better looking than her pop star sister, beautiful Jessica Simpson? Well I would suspect that some men/women might think so. But this kid right here, is still pro Jessica. And why the hell not, she is as close to perfect as a woman can be, visually that is.
But the question is, has Ashlee finally cast her own shadow? The question doesn’t just pertain to her ability to get you off while your sitting home alone in a gaming chair. Both of their careers and personal life have been going in different directions as well.
So to help you make a decision, i comprised a list of the both of them as to what they are doing right now. Also, a few pictures because, well, everyone loves pictures.
Ashlee: Starring in Chicago (the musical) in London
New face of Sketchers’ shoes
Has released her second album, which did ok I think
Single at the moment
And of course, plastic surgery to make her look good
Jessica: Last album flopped by her standards
Has her own line of shoes
Has made movies, though they were not any good
Dating John Mayer
And of course, every man’s muse (for the most part)
That is about the length of my hollywood gossip. But I think it will suffice. Now the pictures that we will all answer the question to, because no one cares what they do, it really comes down to which one looks better in a swim suit. So here are a few pictures to help you decide who’s under who’s shadow. First Ashlee, then Jessica. Enjoy and leave your comments.
A New Have You Ever?
January 11, 2007
It has been a little while since I have been able to post some things on the site. I do apologize to those of you who actually visit my site. I had a few server problems and could not log on to the site to add what I wanted to. With that said, and out of the way, here is my new Have You Ever?
Have You Ever…been caught fuckin?
I know I have. On more than one occasion too. Check the comments for the story and leave your own if you have any.
Brand New…The Dumb Files
January 5, 2007
The Dumb Files…I thought of it while watching ‘Cops’ one night last week. Just a note, ‘Cops’, great fucking show. Anyway, so I was watching Cops and I saw a clip that included some dumb fuck trying to rob a convenient store in like New Mexico I think. So this jackass goes in with nothing covering his face (so the camera got it clear as day), and a gun, obviously. But what this guy did that was ‘dumb’, was drop his wallet while taking the gun out of his pocket. Somehow he didn’t realize he was missing it as he left without it, and the cops tracked him down not long after at his home.
That clip prompted me to start up the Dumb Files. Basically, I will make weekly posts for everyone to comment on about topicspeople that I consider dumb. For starters, let’s go with dumb criminals, which you might see a lot of cause you really can’t get any funnier than a dumb criminal.
So here it is, the first of the Dumb Files…
A man, D.N., was caught drinking and driving while stopped at a red light. The arresting officer was driving behind him when they came to a red light. What gave this officer a clue that he might be lit upt? He was driving down the street in reverse, backwards. I’d like to congratulate the guy for being able to do it, but c’mon, were you really that drunk? Oh, and the guy has been arrersted 12 other times for driving under the influence. You’d think he would learn, or atleast never be able to legally drive ever again.
Leave comments if you got ‘em.
