Best Of Craigslist

I have decided to make this a two-for this week because I can. It is amazing what some people will write on a website like craigslist, and actually think, hope, that the person they are trying to reach will contact them. I’m sure those “casual encounters” get some hits and “erotic encounters” as well. A girl has to make some money somewhere, I guess? But for the rest of you, I hope you know you’re a jackass. But it does make for material that I can use on this site. Thanks douchebags.

Now on to our first tool of the day. I put this up because it references Chuck E Cheese’s. I have a 2 year old, and me and the wife make impromptu stops every now and then. And in all the times I have been there, in my life, I have never encountered something like this asshole.

To the hot 38-year-old mom at Chuck E Cheese’s - black capris, floral top, and discretely lacking your panties… How dare you at a family establishment!?!? It may have been a missed connection there, but I’m so glad we had a chance to “connect” later that night. When the kids are away, the adults can play. Money!

Again, in my life, apart from my wife, I have never met, seen or heard of a hot anything spending time in Chuck E Cheese. Let alone a 38 year old woman. But apparently, this guy hangs out there and hauls in some mommy ass. I applaude it, because it holds highly touted bragging rights in my book, but you’re still a douchebag.

NEXT!!!

This post was titled, “Changing our oil at the same time”. I knew he would be a fucking loser with no sack when I read the title. Then I read what he wrote and confirmed conclusively that he is a fucking loser with no sack. Plus he wears a white T, brown cardigan and torn jeans. That makes him a tool as well.

I was already in the waiting room with my head in my magazine. I was in a white tee, brown cardigan with torn jeans. I didnt even notice you until you almost got into the waiting room, but when you did, the ionic breeze that was next to the magazines blasted your scent to me, and I indulged. It felt like breathing in flowers and cold air when i’ve been breathing in warm and unscented my whole life.

lets meet and talk about the book you were reading. from today on, i will not let an opportunity to meet someone interesting, pass. at least, thank you for that.

Ionic? WTF?!?!? You are you sitting next to a fucking air filtered fan? What kind of pampered garage are you at, douchebag? Moving on…”Breathing in flowers and cold air…” Now your a fucking pussy. And what are thanking her for? The realization that you have no ability to fucking sack up like a real man? Guaranteed, you’ll miss out on anything you consider opportunity in the future. Grow nuts, drink up and rape sluts, douche.

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